Wednesday, May 13, 2009

If I Would Have Known Then What I Know Now!

Do you know that I wore CONTROL TOP pantyhose to my sister's wedding???? That may not sound like an unusual thing, but I was 13 and I weighed less than 80 lbs!

What was being "controlled" anyway?

If I would have known then what I know now- like what a stomach looks and feels like that needs permanent control top hose-I would have lived life much differently! Seriously, there should be a parental permission warning on panty hose. I really thought that I had a "bump" back in the day. HAAAAHHAHAA! (That is the sound of maniacal laughing)

OHHH how I wish I would have held off on bodywearing liposuction.



It was at the end of track season of my Senior year when my friend Kaci said something that I will never forget. "Girls, take good look at your body. This is the best it will ever look!" What a sobering statement!!! I remember taking that very seriously and trying to catalogue a mental picture of the body of my youth.



Lucky for me I discovered Spanx! Well, I actually give credit to my Aunt Jana who lovingly lent me hers when I was a bridesmaid a few years ago. (name changed to protect the innocent--a good niece would never publicly let on that any of her aunts have less than rock-hard abs!)



So anyway, from one woman to another I just can't keep the wonder of Spanx all to myself. It REALLY works! My good friend Shawna (name also changed to protect the innocent) actually has worn 2 at a time for double the control. So if you need to suction it in for a special occasion; or go somewhere in public for the first three years after having a baby...take heart... help is out there!!! Thank you to the women who invented such a marvelous wonder!



Meanwhile, I got interrupted while writing this blog entry due Minnie being entirely unhappy that we put her to bed a half an hour early, and on my way back to the computer accidentally ate my 3rd piece of rhubarb cake with crumb topping soaked in warm vanilla sauce!

LONG LIVE THE SPANX!

1 comment:

Amber said...

I currently live in the knock off version - lets just say I have a kindred bond with Kate's stomach from Jon and Kate plus 8 (her BEFORE Surgery belly). These twins did a number on their momma's belly! : ) Good thing I wouldn't trade them for my pre-pregnancy belly.

The other day at church someeone sweetly told me I was looking good (usually followed with the phrase "for someone who just had twins") to which I promptly replied with something along the lines of - "The high quality of spandex holding me together thanks you." : )

You kind of make me want to go out and get the real thing though and see if there is a difference!

And by the way - I think I remember wearing control top panty hose at Alisa and Amy's weddings too - I would have been 11 and 12. Ahh the humor. Do we blame our older sisters?!?!? (hee hee)

Ok, I've rambled enough.